S5E27: What does it mean to “fully commit” to our goals?
Full transcript:
What does it mean to fully commit to our goals?
Good morning and welcome to the Language Confidence Project, the daily dose of language courage for people who love languages, and people who really don’t, but have to learn one anyway. And before we start, I just wanted to let you know that I’m holding a Cosy and Compassionate Goal Setting and Productivity for Language Learners journaling workshop next Monday 16th October, to allow us to give ourselves some space to reflect on how things are going so far, set our goals or themes for the rest of the year, and get some encouragement along the way. It’s going to cost £8 or just under $10 (USD), from 7-8:30pm UK time on Zoom, we’ll keep it really relaxed and informal, and it's absolutely not going to put any pressure on you to sprint to the end of the year. It’s about deciding how you work in this season, whether you want to slow down or speed up, and in short, what you would love the end of 2023 to look like for you. So bring a notebook and your favourite pens, bring a beverage, and let’s make the end of this year magical.
So today, I wanted to talk about something that I think we all hear a lot and it’s held as a standard for pretty much all ambitious people to attain, and yet I’m not that sure I know what it means yet. And that is, all this talk of “fully committing” to our goals. And on the surface, it all makes sense, you can express it in a wide range of cliches, give it our all, don’t accept any excuses, don’t take no for an answer, pull out all the stops, give it 100%, put your heart and soul into it, all of that. We’ve heard it all.
But then in practice, what does any of that mean?
How do you give 100% to a goal? How do you give it your all?
Well, language learners, I don’t think we do.
I don’t think we can. And I think that’s why we always feel like impostors. That’s why we look around and assume other people must want it more than us. But it’s not us. It’s that we’ve massively overinflated what giving our all looks like.
Being fully committed to any goal doesn’t mean we’ll be going after our goal, strategically, with a clear head and 100% motivation all the time. It doesn’t mean we suddenly get bathed in a sea of clarity or that our discipline won’t wax and wane. And it doesn’t mean you’ll suddenly get superhuman doses of courage and certainty and get-up-and-go.
No.
I’ve come to the conclusion that fully committing to your goal really means coming to the understanding that one can never be fully committed to our goal, and then just, carrying on anyway
Full committing means you’ll constantly be finding ways in which you are not fully committed to that goal. And that’s normal. Whatever your goal is and whatever level you’re at, even if you are world leading in your field, there will still be ways in which you’re holding yourself back, you’re mentally trying to escape, you’re getting distracted, or you’re hiding from things that scare you.
It means not being scared off by that fact, nor doubting that we really want it, nor imagining that everyone else is more fully committed than we are. It’s about noticing the places where we’re hiding but without telling ourselves stories about it. It’s about knowing that we can get better at controlling the urge to procrastinate, or hide, but it's never going to completely go away. We aren't going to have 100% faith, 100% motivation and 100% discipline every single day. It's just not a thing, it never will be, and it’s not something that our brains should be telling us to aim for.
And also that commitment isn’t all or nothing. It’s fine to be more committed or less committed day to day, hour to hour. Commitment isn’t dramatic. It doesn’t need to be intense. It’s that gentle assurance every day that our goal isn’t going anywhere and neither are we.
Commitment isn’t really a badge of honour, and neither is it anything to beat ourselves up about. We are all just doing what we can, and trusting that it will pay off. And it really will pay off.
Good luck today, and I will see you tomorrow.
If you would like more information about the Cosy and Compassionate Productivity Workshop, and to book tickets, visit https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/734781660727
I can’t wait to see you there!